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Maybe having kids. I didn't think either were possible with my current position. If I didn't get offered the promotion, did I want to stay at the gym and keep living month-to-month. Paying rent. Of course, that turned my thoughts to my roommate.
But it didn't seem to matter. One girl said she could tell I was hiding something by the way I shied away from letting her touch me below the belt when we made out. After it had happened a second time with another girl, I realized I must have been subconsciously projecting my fears that I would be rejected. And the irony of it, it was happening anyway. Girls didn't stick around with guys who made it blatantly clear they had secrets.
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And then I couldn't stop. I was weak and had to have you completely. Even then, you floored me with your acceptance of my entire being. my piercings.
My couch. Which had been delivered just two weeks ago. The one I'd gone without spending beyond bills and minimal groceries for six months so I could afford it. And now, their half-naked bodies were rolling all over the plush, suede cushions, the pillows discarded over the back of the couch and scattered on the floor.